Sunday, July 3, 2011

rick.

I've been laying dormant for two weeks here and I apologise for my lack of posts and presence. Things have been pretty hectic over the last few weeks: I've gone away on an amazing romantic weekend to the Hunter Valley, had a farewell party, went away camping and spent an amazing weekend with friends, whilst surfing with whales and dolphins and having an amazing piece of nature right at our door step and finally to having to say goodbye to one of the most IMPORTANT people in my life; RICK.

I never wanted this blog to be a place where I share my angsty feelings and spread a whole post dedicated to my emotional vomit. My blog is a place I find inspiration, an place of electornic record of my ins and outs of life and a connection point to meeting new and amazing people from around the world. I have thought long and hard about writing this post, something that is so personal and emotionally raw, but I eventually came to the decision to do so, because Rick over the course of our relationship and pretty much at the start of this blog has been my BIGGEST source of inspiration and the main catalyst behind my blog.

It was a horrible experience, having to say goodbye to my other half. He was my biggest fan, my biggest inspiration, my best friend who knew me inside out, knew what made me tick and knew what made me happy. I was lucky enough to have his company EVERY SINGLE DAY, without ever tiring of it. Standing at the entrance of the airport terminal and knowing that in just a few minutes, he'd be walking away and onto a flight that would take him away from me was the worst wait of my life. Then finally hugging him for the last time, feeling his body quiver against mine, looking into his beautiful green eyes and then leaning over for that last kiss and finally letting go and watching him walk away completely broke my heart.

Its been a tough few days without him, waking up in the middle of the night to an empty room and coming home to an empty apartment. And waking up that morning and reading a letter he had written to me expressing his feelings and apologies for leaving me but reassuring me that everything would be okay was definitely an experience I would never forget.

Sad yes, but I do have a good feeling about us. I love him whole heartedly and I have no regrets about our relationship whatsoever. I think deep down we both know we'll be okay too, we are two people who love each other dearly and fate somehow will find us back together again.

Things are already looking up, I've already booked my tickets to go over and see him in 3 months. This separation will also allow us both to focus on our careers and finally absence makes the heart grow fonder. In the mean time, thank god for technology. Skype, you have been a life saver.

So ends my post of emotional vomit, spread across your computer screens. It's great to get all this off my chess and that itch to just have an electronic record of a really significant point of my life.

Baby, I know you will be reading this too. So I LOVE you more and more every single day, and I think you're right we will be okay. You left your UGGs at home too, but its okay, its a reminder of you and they can keep mine company through the winter.

Photobucket


X

8 comments:

  1. Oh noooooooooooooooooooooooo :( :( :(:

    Why oh why whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat?

    Why did he go? Where oh why?!?? :( :( :(

    Are you ok bebes?

    Sending you massive hugs, love and HUGS.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thank you for sharing with us.

    You've described that feeling of the last moments before they walk away so well.

    I hope youre doing better every day and all I can say is (whether it helps or not, I dont know) - it definitely gets easier.

    The photos of the ugg boots is adorable xx

    ReplyDelete
  3. Oh honey. This post is so beautiful and even brought a tear to my eyes! :(
    I can't imagine how you must feel - especially when you were at the airport about to leave each other. If the same thing happened to Jacob and I, I'm sure I would be a total mess!
    Things will get easier in time... And like you said, distance makes the heart grow fonder. :)
    Thank the lord for skype! Rick is one lucky guy to have a gal like you!

    xx

    http://aprilialove.com

    ReplyDelete
  4. oh liza liza liza. reading this post absolutely broke my heart because i have experienced EXACTLY what you have gone through as well... (my ex boyfriend left the country for the singaporean army for 2 years). months later, when i went over to singapore to see him, and had to leave him at the airport AGAIN, i cried for 8 hours on the flight home, and then some. oh god it's awful. but anyways, this isn't about me. i hope you're okay dear. keep busy okay? with blogging, seeing other friends, a job, sleeping, just anything- i'm here for you as well :) no doubt you guys have true feelings for each other so you will get through it :) skype is INDEED a life saver.
    i'm sorry if you told me before, but what is rick doing?
    lots of love,
    me xx

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hey babe, its good to see that you're expressing your deepest thoughts about Rick and you guys' relationship. It won't be so easy, but I think its good that he gets to do what he wants to for a long time. And yes, this time off will also get you to think deeply about your own career. :) Its good to do it when you're young so later when you look back you'll never regret it. So keep your chin up, and you will have a really awesome awesome holiday in Japan in 3 months!!! :D Yay to thattt!!! :D Love ya! xx

    m

    http://hippopotamey.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  6. Hey Love,

    Sorry to read bout this, I cannot imagine the pain and sadness you are going through now. :(

    Just reading this post and seeing the photo made me tear. Let me know if you ever need to talk or anything kay?

    Anyhoo, I know you are a strong girl, and can get through this.

    I had a long distance relationship with my BF at the beginning, and it was very heartbreaking. We got through with a lot of msn video chats and phone calls.

    Gamabtte!!!! ♥♥


    xoxo,
    Addie
    The Cat Hag

    ReplyDelete
  7. Ouch, that certainly touched a string. but hey, what hurts only makes you stronger and stronger. Wishing the two of you all the love and support you need. x. lore.

    ReplyDelete
  8. These photos are amazing! Great blog! Now following! Hope you can return the favor, if my blog inspires you :)



    XO,

    Mybrunetteworld.com

    ReplyDelete

Thanks for taking the time to read and comment on my blog. I really appreciate every single one of you guys, contributing and shaping my blog! X